Medicare sucks. Caregiving is hard. Too bad the pain of aging feels like old news in new memoir

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Freelance writer and exertion Lucy Schiller bumped up against the issues of aging, eldercare and loneliness done her grandmothers. When the household pulled her maternal grandmother, Mary Ann, from assisted surviving during the pandemic, Schiller became her superior caregiver. Her paternal grandmother, Anita, was little fortunate; she contracted COVID-19 from a location healthcare adjutant and died successful a hospital.

Book Review

Aging Out: An Exploration of Caregiving, Community, and How Americans Grow Old

By Lucy Schiller
Flatiron Books: 272 pages, $30

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As she relates successful “Aging Out,” the daze of Anita’s decease was a origin successful Schiller’s abrupt relocation from a cardinal New York assemblage municipality to Pittsburgh, wherever she knew nary one. Schiller calls the determination “a half-desperate program to simply alteration the inheritance scenery of my beingness for the millionth time.”

While grieving, scrambling to marque a living, taking agelong walks with her canine and wrestling with her chosen solitude, Schiller embarks connected a quest to recognize the institutions and attitudes that signifier aged property successful America. “What was the narration betwixt idiosyncratic fearfulness of oldness and the ways successful which oldness was structured successful society?” she asks.

The resulting book, a deliberately meandering relationship of her Steel City sojourn, weds memoir, travelogue, philosophical rumination and journalistic investigation. Schiller, an MFA postgraduate of the University of Iowa and present an adjunct prof of nonfiction astatine Texas Tech University, is simply a fluid writer. But astir of what she covers is well-trod ground.

It’s worthy asking whom she envisions arsenic her audience. Most older readers cognize this territory; younger ones person other, much pressing concerns, including however to spend beingness successful the here-and-now.

Perhaps Schiller, a millennial successful her 30s, hopes they volition place with her idiosyncratic struggles. But her loneliness seems mostly self-imposed, possibly compounded by what she describes arsenic “a terrible strain” of obsessive-compulsive disorder. “It turns out, laughably, that an involvement successful privacy, and staying quiescent astir interior feelings, are hallmarks of this condition,” she writes, offering a partial mentation for her wariness of company.

Pondering the American mode of aging, Schiller initially adopts a posture of ignorance and naivete truthful utmost that it seems similar a pose. She puzzles retired the distinctions among nursing homes, assisted surviving facilities and continuing attraction status communities, arsenic good arsenic location healthcare. And she underlines the information that, erstwhile it comes to semipermanent attraction successful the United States, lone the comparatively well-off person bully choices. This isn’t precisely news.

Another Schiller enquiry involves the acquainted complexities of Medicare. She notes that, arsenic a nationalist programme for seniors, it is truthful inadequate that it requires backstage options, specified arsenic Medigap and Medicare Advantage, to insubstantial implicit sum gaps. Picking the champion program for one’s needs tin beryllium a daunting option, requiring trained assistance oregon cautious study. Schiller attends an informational seminar by a broker for Medicare Advantage plans and decides, unhelpfully, that they are neither “a solution oregon a problem.”

Schiller’s reporting methods rely, to immoderate extent, connected serendipity. “I tended toward … a benignant of diffuse sallying done the world, staying unfastened to the coincidence, digression, and movement,” she writes. She calls the method “antinarrative.”

All that sallying takes her down immoderate unexpected byways. She returns to a occidental Pennsylvania municipality called Harmony, wherever she erstwhile had “a horrible, endless day implicit crepes,” to analyse a onslaught implicit wage and moving conditions astatine a troubled nursing home. That leads to a agelong treatment of the usage of restraints connected the elderly.

At 1 point, Schiller finds a institution called Papa that employs younger “Pals” to assistance older adults. With the backing of wellness security companies, the Pals supply companionship, transportation, housecleaning services and more. Schiller tries thing akin arsenic a unpaid for a wellness security company, reaching retired to an aged Black pistillate by phone. They stumble implicit clip into an improbable friendship.

One occupation with each these efforts to mitigate old-age loneliness, Schiller notes, is that the loneliest procreation is really Gen Z. And the loneliness surveys themselves, she suggests, whitethorn beryllium suspect.

Schiller delves, inevitably, into the past of AARP, an enactment that adjacent successful its earliest days was entangled with the wellness security industry. And user advocator Ralph Nader, for whom she does immoderate editing work, tips her to the communicative of activistic Maggie Kuhn, laminitis of the Gray Panthers.

Kuhn, Schiller writes, understood “the hostility betwixt the societal alleged nothingness of aged property and its vibrant realities.” Which brings Schiller to the intersection of aging and disability, and to Programs for All-Inclusive Care for the Elderly (PACE), which supply community-based attraction arsenic an alternate to nursing homes.

In the end, Schiller has a spell astatine parsing her ain motivations. “I had descended into the unusual subterranean structures of aging, astir arsenic a mode to debar the modern satellite … ,” she writes. “Age … was a adjuvant distancing tool: older people’s vulnerabilities, including those of my ain grandparents, helped to distract maine from my ain contiguous and future. ... I inactive did not cognize however to seal implicit the gaping coiled of the pandemic, however to determination forward.”

For each her verbiage, she tin find nary casual fix, nor adjacent a analyzable one. “It was not imaginable for maine to ideate a solution to the level of fragmentation, pain, and dysfunction I saw,” she writes, leaving readers without overmuch justification for having followed her rambling, idiosyncratic quest.

Klein, a taste newsman and professional successful Philadelphia, has been a three-time finalist for the National Book Critics Circle’s Nona Balakian Citation for Excellence successful Reviewing.

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